It is now most definitely that time of year again. There’s a nip in the air and a crumble in the oven. And as the draft in the kitchen gets ever chillier, I’m kicking myself yet again for not having to managed to train the cats to use the cat flap in the summer months. Season of mists and mellow fruitfulness indeed (and thanks to the film adaptation of Bridget Jones’s Diary, I’ll never be able to hear those lines without the mental addition of “I f***ing love Keats!”); but also, it must be said, season of spiders.
So far, they’ve kept outside, and for that I’m grateful… but the change in the weather has clearly sent a clarion call to spiderkind to get their larders stocked up for the winter months. The result? Cobwebs. Everywhere.
The first almost caught me out. Arriving home one afternoon, I tripped gaily up the steps to our front door and – froze. Stretched out between the wooden rails of the porch was a beautifully constructed web, a perfect octagon, all silver and shimmering. And there, bold as brass, was the master craftsman himself, stretched out slap bang in the middle of his handiwork and just daring me to break it.
I couldn’t do it, of course. All that endeavour! All that hopefulness! Just for someone bigger to come along and rip it to smithereens? To the unpublished author, the metaphor was just too stark to ignore. (Okay, I might be feeling a little raw right now…) I ducked underneath and left it intact. My husband, bless his heart, did the same thing. Three days later and it’s still there, if not quite as pristine. An unworthy part of me is hoping that the postman will do our dirty work for us before the week is out.
But that’s not the only web. Oh no. There’s another in front of the window of our second bedroom. And another outside the living room window. I’m starting to worry that they’re working together. Maybe we’ll wake up one morning and the whole house will be enveloped in sticky gossamer. Maybe we’ll find ourselves enmeshed by default!
I’m keeping count. When we reach double figures, I’m going out there with the feather duster.